Since the start of the scandalous Dominique Strauss-Kahn affair (which began with charges of sexually assaulting a hotel maid in New York City in May, but then included allegations by a French novelist that the man tried to rape her in 2002 when she was just 22 years old, and then included an investigation into his role in an illegal prostitution ring working out of a four-star hotel in the French city of Lille) the former IMF chief has remained stubbornly mum about events –especially about the original sin committed in Manhattan.

So it is with eager curiosity that French people are reading his side of the allegedly brutal sex story in a new book. Strauss-Kahn, who is most often referred to by his initials DSK in France, spilled the beans to his own biographer, French journalist Michel Taubmann, who penned the book “DSK Affairs: The Second Inquiry”. 

Strauss-Kahn has been quick to distance himself from the book, saying it is not his official version. Even so, French readers who were after details of the licentious encounter have been sorely disappointed. This is what Taubmann wrote about DSK’s romp with hotel maid Nafissatou Diallo:

“Upon seeing Strauss-Kahn emerge naked from the bathroom of his hotel suite, the young Guinean seems surprised, but not the least terrified. Strauss-Kahn is not embarrassed. He does not protest against the unlikely presence of a housekeeper in the presidential hotel suite that is still occupied. Nafissatou Diallo crosses the room and moves toward the exit. But she does not leave. Strauss-Kahn takes notice. He follows her with his eyes in the hallway. Nafissatou Diallo turns around. She stares into his eyes. Then suggestively gazes at his penis. The flesh is weak. DSK sees an invitation. The situation amuses him. Rarely in his life has he turned down the opportunity for a moment of pleasure. He does not resist the temptation of fellatio.”

The author wants us to come to terms with only two possible explanations for what happened. a. Diallo entered the room with the intent of seducing DSK. Or b. She was instantly enamored (as any woman would have been, right?) by Strauss-Kahn strudel.

Not a word exchanged before or after execution; not a single question, polite request or display of emotion expressed by either party. DSK might as well have been depositing an envelope into a mail box.

This version seems as unlikely as Diallo’s. She was slammed as an inconsistent liar by annoyed New York prosecutors who in August said they could not rely on her testimony to try “le Perv”.

My verdict is that we’ve learned nothing from Taubmann about what really happened in the hotel room. But there are a couple of golden nuggets that made his text worth reading.

The day before the encounter with Diallo, Taubmann writes that one of DSK’s friends and presidential campaign advisors allegedly warned him: “Be careful with the girls”. He replies: “Don’t worry. From now on, I won’t look at a single woman.”

Then, at the end of the book, the writer includes a priceless exchange with DSK.

Taubmann: Have you decided to change your lifestyle?

Strauss-Kahn: Yes. I have decided to end all that. It’s done.

Poor, poor Strauss-Kahn, who has yet to understand that the ladies just can’t help themselves when they come near his sex-inducing aura. Asking Strauss-Kahn to keep the strudel under wraps is like asking the sun to stop shining.